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Book 50 - Fake It Like You Mean It by Megan Murphy

Elle is a podcaster who has been managing her aging grandmother’s (Lovie) care from afar. She gets a call from the care coordinator saying Lovie’s dementia is worsening and she needs 24 hour care. The agency sends a nurse and Elle heads over, not realizing the nurse will be staying over in her old bedroom. Surprise ensues, along with some oddly irrational anger, when she meets nurse Adam. 

Their initial enemies situation feels contrived, but okay, I’ll go with it. Lovie sees the two of them together and thinks Adam is her deceased husband, and she thinks Elle is Lovie. To keep Lovie from getting upset, Adam and Elle decide to play along. 

Sigh. I’ve been working for 25 years with people who have dementia. They often mistake a daughter for their mother or sister. A granddaughter could be a daughter or sister. They may not recognized themself in a mirror, but they still know who they are. I’ve never had a patient think someone else is THEMSELF. I could maybe see someone looking a a family member and seeing the resemblance saying something like, “Are you me?” in a momentary word-salad kind of way, but there is no way someone would have the verbal ability to communicate but not be oriented at all to themself. And then the (small spoiler but if you buy this premise you probably won’t care) super convenient day of clarity for Lovie was so absolutely unrealistic, it irritated me. If Lovie is so confused that she isn’t oriented to herself (which once again, not super realistic) for months, she’s not going to all of a sudden become back to her healthy self, speaking with complete clarity.

Ugh. The writing was fine. Elle’s friends were great. Dementia royally sucks. Books incorporating dementia have a lot of promise. Books that use dementia as a convenient plot devise get two stars. (5.5)

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